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Writer Mom Life Episode 7: Trish Henrich and Mom Guilt

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Daphne spoke with Trish just a few weeks before she published the first book in her Superhero series, Serpent's Sacrifice. She has been preparing for quite some time, and has a five year goal for her writing. This is not her first foray into a creative career, however. She came from the world of acting, and even made a superhero web series a few years ago. When she felt it was time to start writing, she started big with her first NaNoWriMo and hit it out of the park with 90,000 words!  

 

She gives a great rundown of her preparation for the launch of her first book, and then details her NaNoWriMo experience. Other topics of discussion include:

  • Her goals for this book and her 5 year goal

  • "Doing the basics well" (mailing list, website, ARC team, etc.)

  • The web series she did with her husband

  • Why she made the shift to fiction writing (hint: kids and acting is even harder to juggle than kids and writing!)

  • How she prepared for her first NaNoWriMo (while being a vegetarian!)

  • Dealing with the mom guilt of writing so much in one month

  • The writing habits she kept from the experience

  • Why the experience was a good thing for both her and her family 


Trish's Links
Her first book:  https://www.amazon.com/Serpents-Sacrifice-Vigilantes-Book-1-ebook/dp/B075PLKZT5

Her website: http://trishheinrich.com/ 



J. R.'s tips and links:

There seems to be this pervasive expectation in the culture of the USA that moms should be able to care for the children, go to work, keep the house clean, schedule and manage all appointments, attend school events, and cook wholesome meals for the family every day, and if you do anything less you must be failing as a mother. This expectation seeps into our psyche, and is very hard to shake, even when you know better.

But it is important to remember that pursuing your own passions now and then, and having some time to ourselves, is actually -- honestly -- better for both YOU and the rest of your family!

In order to make this happen, here are a few things to do:

  • Plan ahead - make it known to your kids and SO/spouse that this will be happening, when, and for how long.

  • Ask for help - if you have older kids, now is the time to delegate some household tasks to them! If you already do that, give them another task to take care of during the time/day/week you're going to be taking time for yourself to free up your own schedule and give you less to "catch up on" later. Same goes for the SO/spouse: assign duties beforehand, up front, even if only temporary. 

  • Perhaps schedule a visit with the family! - circumstances allowing, build-in grandparent or auntie/uncle time to your schedule and make everyone aware that's the time you'll be taking to get your YOU time in. You can visit with your family during this time too, but segment it wisely, so you have time for both.

  • Hire outside help - if circumstances don't allow for the family to keep an eye on the little one(s) for awhile, consider hiring a babysitter for a set amount of time every week, for example. NO GUILT! You need a break sometimes, too!

  • Start SMALL - Mom Guilt doesn't mess around. It will take some time to get used to taking time away from the family to do your thing, and it will take some time to shake the guilt and realize the world is not going to implode if you take time to do what YOU want to do for a bit. So start with small time increments at first, let everyone adjust, and gradually increase as you see fit.

 

REMEMBER:

  • Taking time for yourself is important! Make it happen the way you make everything else happen, you awesome mom you!

  • It will improve your mood to have some quiet self-time and/or work on a project you are passionate about, and a happy mom is a good mom!

  • It will help teach the kids independence, patience, and respect!

  • NaNoWriMo is a great excuse to put this into practice, and train your family at the same time! ;) (see www.nanowrimo.org)